Valentine's Day.. and every other day

Daily Drumbeat 2/14/14

Exerpt from: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/winifred-m-reilly/what-valentines-day-can-t_b_4763866.html

Let's start calling it "Ordinary Relationship Day!!!.  Here's to the women in our life (Miriam, Kelly..who mean so much more every other day of the year!)

Nowadays, much of life can appear, well, larger than life, more dazzling than life. Looking at Facebook, it can seem as if everyone's gotten a fantastic new job, along with a gargantuan raise, traveled to somewhere exotic, cooked a dinner to die for, and seen THE ABSOLUTELY BEST sunset, bar none. Compared to that, your regular old life can seem dreadfully flat.

Who slaps together a meatloaf sandwich and posts a photo of it on Instagram? Who shares a snapshot of their beautiful new couch and includes the never-ending basket of unfolded laundry that sits on it -- and is even willing to mention the struggles that surround folding it? Why not have a holiday that says "This is what married life is actually like and it's good and satisfying enough, as is?"

My vote is to call it "Ordinary Relationship Day" -- a day when couples acknowledge the un-edited, un-photoshopped truth about life with their partner, including the good, the bad and the ridiculously absurd.

What a relief it would be to see a photo of the beautiful new duvet cover on your friends' unmade bed, the takeout Chinese food dinner that they ate at 9 p.m., straight from the containers, one spouse crashed out with their four year-old who's been having trouble sleeping, the other wondering whether to wake her or just let her sleep.

People often grouse about the everyday annoyances and disappointments, the repetitive frustrations that make marriage a challenge. I say, let's celebrate the whole lot of it: the triumphs, the struggles and the lessons we learn from them.

Real love is messy and complicated, delightful and sweet and worth more than anything we might get, once a year, in a pink, heart-shaped box with a sparkly bow.